We were determined to travel light this holiday and lookit what we've gone and done now. We show no fear when it comes to buying something ridiculously large, unwieldy or downright unsociable while we're away. A kingsize quilt was the last thing we dragged home and that had to have its very own bag bought for it as well. This is an African shield thingy and it was only after we'd bought it and it'd been bubble wrapped, protected with cardboard and covered in fragile stickers and we were winging our way to our next venue high fiving our daring, when it struck me that - "oh fuck - it's WOOD" and anyone who knows anything, knows that getting wood into Australia or New Zealand is tantamount to getting a green grocer to sell you a single grape - the only harder thing to get through being a banana - which Nigel tried in 1998 and we're still paying off those fines.
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